Random idiocy, Porsche

Businesses can be so daft at times. Ignoring the fact that Tiscali are useless twats, why the hell would:

a) Betfair bother to send me out a cheque for my entire account, that, after my "lay 0-0, United-Villarreal, stunts gone horribly wrong" last bet amounted to 31 pence, when it'll cost them that much to post it, and

b) Crookesmoor library not give me change for a tenner in two fives (which I needed to buy a book privately), but would sell me a pencil for 10p which I paid for with a tenner, doing them out of lots of coinage as well? Madness.

Anyway, the future of poker has arrived, and it's Porsche. Limit, obviously, six max. Pineapple (same as hold'em, except your dealt three cards and discard one after the flop but before the flop betting round), omaha (high), razz, 7 stud (high), chicago (7 stud high but the pot is split between the high hand and the highest spade in the hole - GREAT for fishing), hold'em and omaha eight or better. Orbit of each. However, there's a twist...

Obviously the best Porsche is a 911. So, if on third street in a stud game you have A-A-9, or if that's the flop on a flop game, there's craziness. All bets are off, and in stud the holder of the porsche wins a big bet off everyone, in hold'em whoever has closest to montana banana wins a big bet off everyone, and in omaha the best badugi hand does the same.

Now to get some bastards to play it...